We base our behavior off what people think of us. We are who they want us to be. I was thinking… if I were blind, how would I know how to…be? When I whisper, I base the pitch of my voice off the attention of others. When I yell, my voice grows louder until heads turn my way. When I speak, I use the expressions of others and how they respond to influence my own words. I say nothing for myself, but for my reputation, because reputation is of great significance in this society. If you have a bad reputation, you are no one significant; no one worth listening to. I wish, in the words of Joan Jett, I didn’t give a damn about my reputation.
I wish that when I spoke I used my own words. I’m not even sure which words are mine. These are the reasons that when I look at myself in the mirror, I don’t know who looks back. And it’s not simply an identity crisis; it is who I am. But… who am I? If you really start to think about it, really ponder who you are, you’ll find yourself down a deep, dark well that never wants to end. You’ll find yourself going in circles. Maybe we aren’t supposed to know who we are. And yet, we try so hard to discover ourselves. We seek for the answer, but have no idea where it lies. Within ourselves? Within others? Maybe if we stopped trying so hard, we’d finish this lifelong quest.